Selamat Hari Raya

4 days has passed since the big day of Syawal '08.. and usually like other raya since my late grandmother has passed away, everyone will gather at my place since my parents are the eldest, even on my father's side..

My mother's side of the family came Eta between 1500 to 1600hours, and as usual, there were ketupats (my father's specialty) and other dishes cooked by me, my mother.. or the rest of the makciks, kinda like potluck if u wanna put it that way.

This year I can feel the sense of emptiness in the atmosphere without having atuk around anymore.. Usually, since arwah nenek has passed away, atuk doesn't celebrate Hari Raya here in Singapore, but for the past couple of years, he will call me up and wish me and the rest of the family, or send me a greeting card to send his regards.. everytime through me. This year feels that emptiness because I don't get a card, and there's no hearing of his voice through the phone. I miss that so badly.. but I just can't cry. It feels really painful to cry and whenever I'm on the verge of it, it just holds back by itself. I miss him so badly.

It wasn't so kecoh as per past few years, I can feel that.. but no one seem to show it in their faces. I made sure my family celebrates this raya well, so I had bought a few new items in the house, and plus with my new semi-pro camera.. everyone was more or less distracted. And the most amazing and best thing about this year's raya is that we, or most importantly, I managed to take our family photo.. because that's one of the main reasons why I bought a semi-pro. And the photo looked great. Alhamdulillah..

Sebelah abah pulak, we didn't get to take because they came late and I was shagged to the bone already. My cousin, Idah managed to take a few shots, so maybe when she gets online, I'll just ask for it.

The next day, went out with my closest friends, i.e. my colleagues until around 1950hours for visiting to each others' house and a couple other colleagues' house. I didn't manage to complete the round with them as I had to join my family at 2000hours to go to Wak Esah's place.. Otherwise, I still really enjoyed myself, because it isn't about going to the houses that matters most, it's just the quality time I had with my friends at that time that matter.. Alhamdulillah at least this year I get to celebrate my Hari Raya with them.

Remember the night before I was unable to bond with my father's side due to extreme fatigue? Well, at Wak Esah's place I managed to make up for that lost time with them, especially with my cousins.. And that really felt amazing too. Nasib sey, I brought my camera along.. Dapat jugak ambik gambar with them. Fuiish~

This year's raya is rather quiet than other years, because most of my cousin's, even my sister is taking their exams. It is the exam period, especially with the PSLE, O and A Levels... So yeah, its ok. I am just really thankful that I had quality time with my family and my closest of friends on the 1st and 2nd day of raya.. Alhamdulillah. These people are very important to me and I'm glad I dah dapat selesaikan yang lebih penting dulu..

Tonight, my parents, Cik Pah and Cik Din pergi rumah Yot, but my siblings and my cousins and my whole big family tak dapat join.. Takpelah, at least the important members of the family went to visit her..

I am really looking forward to next weekend on the 12th October '08, InsyaAllah semuanya akan dapat berjalan dengan lancar and I get to be with my whole family that day.

I am also looking out for Shahril to come over, to make a mini hari raya gathering at my place on Wednesday with my colleagues, and also.. hopefully dapat pergi rumah Shikin ke, Sufiah ke. InsyaAllah.. I hope Helmi can come over jugak? Hehe..

Sunyilah raya tahun ni.. Kawan2 datang, buat kecoh2 sikit boleh tak? =)

I hope for better days and settling of thoughts and decisions soon, in my life and my future. Semoga Hari Raya ni bertambah baik, keakraban sesama keluarga dan teman juga amat sangat di inginkan olehku..

I hope the days ahead will be much better than today. InsyaAllah..

Until then,
I miss you my friends, my family.. and atuk. Harap2 nenek Zaimah sihat2 sahaja..
Rindu seh.

Selamat Hari Raya semua..
Selamat Hari Raya sayang..

Salam rindu, Salam sayang.
Nurul Ain.

Au Viderzeen.